God Damned Young People Don’t Lift a Finger Around the House
The problem with young people today is that they don’t do chores.
When I was a lad, young people had a laundry list of daily chores we were expected to complete. We made our beds, swept the floors, rotated the tires on our old dad’s car and all we expected in return was 3 squares a day, a warm bed at night and the continuance of our parent’s largely conditional love.
Young people spent the first dozen years of life as little more than indentured servants for Christ’s sake. It’s why people had children in the first place and it hardened us for a long and productive life spent working in factories or toiling anonymously behind a desk.
Completing chores gave us the satisfaction of contributing to the household and taught us valuable life skills as well. I could mend a fence by 8, patch a roof by 9, and was able to castrate a bull with nothing more than a Pez dispenser, a length of twine and a 6 volt battery before my 10th birthday.
But young people today don’t do chores. They wouldn’t know a vacuum from a mop and would faint at the idea of being introduced to either. They view their houses as 5-star hotels with them as the guest and the parents as bellhop, maid and resident chef. To them, adolescence is nothing but a decade-long spa treatment.
And even if you are able to prod the little lollygaggers into taking out the trash they do so under protest and only with the promise that they’ll be paid for their efforts. They expect to be handed a roll of twenties for picking up their socks, hanging up their coats and even for mowing the god damned lawn.
If I’d ever had the audacity to ask my old dad to pay me for cutting the grass, he would have mowed me down with a slap to the head and mulched my ass with a stiff leather belt. And then he would have charged me for the beating.
When these young people get around to pulling their heads out of their asses and move out on their own they’re going to be in for a damned rude awakening. Who the Hell are they going to call to change their sheets, butter their toast or clean their damned eaves?
We’re raising a generation of indolent and functionally ignorant young pups who’ve never laced a shoe and who are incapable of the simplest of tasks. And mark my words, the first time they have a light bulb burn out on them, they will be well and truly lost in the dark.
They don’t do chores. That’s the problem with young people today.