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Affronts to Old People #1 – Sweat Pants with Words on the Ass

One of the most outrageous assaults young people have committed on common decency has to be the practice of having words written across the ass of their sweats pants.

I see it everywhere. Inane and distasteful words like “Angel”, “Princess” and “Hottie” printed across the prodigious backsides of young people. It’s moronic and indecent.

Just this morning I was confronted with the disturbing sight of a young woman with the word “bootylicious” scrawled across her derriere.  I don’t know what the Hell it means but I stand by my assertion that if your ass is large enough to accommodate a twelve letter word it may not be a feature you wish to draw additional attention to.

I may not be able to stop this atrocious practice, but if it is going to continue I suggest any one of the following 10 words/phrases might be more appropriate to display on your young rumps:

“Lazy”

That’s right. “Lazy.” If you don’t have the energy to pull on sensible trousers and do up a zipper for God’s sake, you may as well come clean about it and admit that you’re a shiftless, indolent lay-about. People may not respect your choice of apparel but they’ll appreciate your honesty damn it.

“MacDonalds”

They likely had a hand in building that giant ass you’re so intent on decorating, so you may as well give them credit for a job well done. They may even give you a free “Whoppler” as their way of saying thanks.

“Back”

The way I see it, this is damned practical and not unlike writing left and right on the shoes of dullards and toddlers.  At least the word “back” serves a purpose and will help these young people get their pants on right side around. It’s a small thing but a step in the right direction.

“Oblivious”

You don’t need to understand why. In fact, its likely better that you don’t.

“Kick Me”

I’m all about motivation and my guess is that if you enjoy word-enhanced sweat pants you’re likely on an express train to nowhereville and would benefit from a good old fashioned kick in the ass.

“Have You Seen This Child?”

If you walk around in sweat pants all day you likely have parole conditions to fulfill and community service may be part of that equation. Here’s a chance for you to give something back and help people locate missing children. Milk cartons get stuck in the fridge but your giant ass seems to be everywhere so slap a picture of a missing kid on it and do some good for a change, damn it.

“My Other Ass Fits In Real Pants”

For no reason other than it makes me chuckle.

“The End is Nigh”

If there was ever a sign that the Four Horseman are mounting up and getting ready to ride it’s the preponderance of young people with the word “juicy” written on their backsides. You may as well get the word out that we are all going to Hell and that the bus is leaving soon.

“Unemployable”

Time for some truth in advertising, damn it. Plus, as an added bonus, it may dissuade other impressionable young people from heading down this ill-advised road, venturing over to “Target” and perusing the “fornicating teen department” for similar attire.

“This Space for Rent”

Look, if you’re going to parade around like a jiggling billboard you may as well try to generate some income from it. I’m sure there must be some gelatin companies or cottage cheese makers looking for cheap and easy advertising opportunities and your ass may be right up their alley.

I hope that these suggestions will be helpful to you young folks. The other option of course is just to start wearing sensible clothing and stop dressing like a dyslexic, bootylicious prostitute.

Damned young people. They make me crazy.

 (with many thanks to my young friend bschooled)

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93 Comments leave one →
  1. 1:43 pm

    I’ve actually never seen anyone where sweatpants such as these, just the little itty-bitty sweat shorts that are probably a size 0 and barely cover the ass-end with room enough for very short words.

    • 12:24 am

      You can consider yourself Lucky, Yorksnbeans. It’s not a sight I’d wish on anyone.

      Shameful is what it is.

      All the best

      Don

    • zeusiswatching permalink
      1:27 am

      You just need to visit a WalMart on a Friday night in the American South. They are worn in lieu of, or as companions to the camouflage.

    • Anonymous permalink
      7:32 pm

      WHAT THE HELL.

  2. 1:47 pm

    You are certainly proving your chops as the King of the Curmudgeons. That’s no small achievement, and a worthy situation, seeing as we are so desperately in need of leadership in this day and age.

    If there’s anything worse than what you’ve described today, it’s the shameful spectacle of seeing white men over the age of 50 sporting the “hip-hop” look, replete with baggy basketball shorts and caps turned backward.

    No wonder young people today are angry and confused. They’ve been raised by insecure, lifelong teenagers.

    • 12:31 am

      Many thanks, Joan of Argghh, and nice to see you again.

      I think the beginning of summer may be to blame for my curmudgeonly mood as of late. Not only is the heat a damned menace but the young people seem to come crawling out of the woodwork and into the streets. They’re everywhere.

      And I must say you are right about these older folks dressing like morons too. Young people get my goat but there seems to be enough stupid to go around for everyone.

      Take care now.

      Don

  3. 2:22 pm

    it’s not like we’re already looking

    • 12:36 am

      Thanks for visiting Davis,

      I won’t speak for everyone but I can assure you that my ogling days have long since passed.

      And I don’t tend to look at my neighbours trash cans either. But if you spray paint the word “Funkytown” in pink neon across them chances are I’m going to notice.

      All the best Davis and keep your eyes on the road, son.

      Best regards,

      Don

  4. 2:30 pm

    Hahaha!

    Great job Don. This is a really funny post!

    • 12:37 am

      Many thanks deathinfrance and nice to hear from you again.

      I appreciate the kind words, lad.

      Don

  5. Lynn permalink
    3:26 pm

    Sweat pants and big asses are never a good combo, no matter what it says on the back. Here’s a phrase that’s appropriate- “wide load”!

    • Lynn permalink
      3:28 pm

      I’ll be embroidering that phrase on my sweatpants if I don’t get off this evil machine more.

    • 12:41 am

      Thanks Lynn.

      A fine suggestion. I’ll add it to the list I’m compiling. I figure a nasty letter to the President is long overdue.

      All the best and nice to see you back.

      Don

  6. Gerard permalink
    3:55 pm

    I’ve never seen a guy wearing sweatpants with words on the butt, but I see many girls with sweatpants that say “PINK” on the back, which is the brand name of the clothing. That one doesn’t bother me much, but I’ve seen other things that are ridiculous. I once saw a trio of girls wearing booty-shorts that read “HUMP N’ DUMP” on the back of them. That’s just disgusting…

    Great post, Don. I had a good laugh.

    Gerard

    • 12:49 am

      Hi Gerard,

      I have to say I’m grateful that you haven’t seen this happening with men. It’s bad enough with the gals (and this post was really directed specifically to them).

      Men aren’t much better though when it comes to their t-shirts. I saw some young man at the zoo last summer with three young kids. He had a t-shirt that read “I’m a vagitarian.”

      Yup. That’s my dad! He loves performing oral sex so much he’s announcing it on a t-shirt at the zoo so that all the kids can see.

      Makes me cringe.

      Where was I? Oh, yes, the “Hump’n’Dump.” That is damned sad. Just sad.

      Anyway, thanks for visiting with me Gerard. Always nice to hear your views on things.

      Don

  7. Friar permalink
    4:07 pm

    “Unemployable”.

    HAHAHAH!

    That’s probably the most accurate one!

    • 12:51 am

      Thanks Friar. Have to admit it was the first one that came to mind. And, yes, likely the most accurate.

      Take care.

  8. 4:30 pm

    I am almost speechless, Don. And that doesn’t happen very often.

    I believe you got right to the ‘bottom’ of the issue (LMAO!!!), and
    came up with viable alternatives to potentially turn this eyesore into something that will draw attention to the m’asses’ (LMAO!!!x2), in a creative and inspirational way.

    One thing, though…the “Have you seen this child” advertisement may do more harm than good. Unlike innocuous milk cartons, generally the public can’t tolerate ogling that kind of monstrosity for extended periods of time, which would be necessary if they were to commit the missing child’s specific traits to memory.

    Thanks for the shout-out, Don, you have no idea how proud I am to have been a part of this truly outstanding post.

    Bschooled.

    • 12:55 am

      Many thanks, Bschooled, and a good point on the missing children.

      I’ll rethink that option before I send the final list to the White House. I’m hopefull that someone in Washingoton is going to wake up, get of their ass and take some action on this.

      All the best,

      Don

  9. Rick the Curmudgeon permalink
    5:23 pm

    Don,

    You are insightful and beyond the pale in your ability to pinpoint the asinine behaviour and habits of the young people today.

    I think your idea for ass captions is great, and if my critter asks for a pair of pants with anything written across the ass, I’m going to make her a pair that just says “Dumb.”

    Bah! Damned kids.

    • 1:01 am

      Thanks Rick and nice to see you “bah”k.(Sorry, I have a weakness for puns and bassets allsorts licorice).

      I certainly hope you’re able to keep that lass in sensible slacks, Rick. If not, though, “Dumb” is the way to go.

      All the best

      Don

  10. 5:46 pm

    I was once told that anything that comes out of George Bush’s mouth and babies’ asses are not to be taken seriously…

    It looks like it works for other things [asses] too!

    Ivan

    • 1:05 am

      Thanks Ivan.

      I take it pretty seriously. And I really do find it mind-boggling.

      Good to see you lad. Hope all is well in Brazil.

      Don

  11. Christine permalink
    5:53 pm

    I can’t agree more!

  12. Sandy permalink
    7:43 pm

    ‘Unemployable’ – ☺ HAHAHAH you are once again brilliant and hilarious. Are you British perhaps?
    Love ya!♥

    • 1:07 am

      Thanks Sandy,

      I appreciate your kind words, I really do.

      And, no, I’m not English. I have some Scottish blood in me though.

      Take care and thanks for stopping in.

      Don

  13. Annie Nonymous permalink
    8:20 pm

    “My Other Ass Fits In Real Pants”

    Made me chuckle too!

    Thank you, Mr. Mills.

  14. Friar permalink
    8:59 pm

    Don

    I’m surprised you didn’t add “ASS CLOWN” to this list.

    That would pretty much sum up everything, wouldn’t it?

    • Lily permalink
      9:23 pm

      or perhaps, http://www.assclown.com ??

    • downcastmysoul permalink
      9:55 pm

      You were ahead or tails of me…

    • 1:16 am

      I thought about it Friar but couldn’t do it.

      It is my new favorite word after all and I didn’t want to cheapen it.

      p.s. Lilly! Good lord, I fell out of my chair when I clicked that link. I should have known something like that would exist. (I guess cheapening the word wasn’t as much of an issue as I had imagined.)

      Don

  15. Lily permalink
    9:22 pm

    Dear Don,

    Once again you have put a smile on an old lady’s dial. Thank you, Sir.

    Best wishes,

    Lily Fossil

    • 10:26 pm

      You’re traveling in interesting circles, Ms. Fossil.

    • 1:17 am

      Always lovely to see you Lily.

      Thanks for visiting.

      Best regards,

      Don

      • Lily permalink
        3:32 am

        Dear Don,

        My most humble apologies for that link. I actually thought I was making it up, and didn’t think for one moment there would really be a site named for assclowns specifically.

        Please accept my sincerest apologies.

        Lily Fossil

  16. Polly Anna permalink
    9:23 pm

    Mr. Mills,

    You really crack me up. I’ve been reading you for a while, but I was laughing so hard today I decided to write in and say, “well done, sir!” PLEASE, leave the sweatpants at home!!

    • 1:23 am

      Thanks for taking the time to write, Polly Anna. It’s nice to hear from you.

      All the best and thanks for the “well done.” Appreciate it.

      Don

  17. downcastmysoul permalink
    10:00 pm

    This post rocks! It’s always some floozy girlfriend of some guy with baggy clothes a baseball cap and a sneer (bling optional). She’s almost always overweight and hangs off him like a cheap rag. The other people I see who wear these pants are heavy single moms on the bus who drag their huge baby strollers on the bus and take up 4 bus seats. Back in the day, strollers were like 1/3 that size. Of course the “babies” are bigger nowadays. I read a book that said a man in today’s society is not considered mature until the age of 34! 34!? That was almost middle aged 50 years ago! I think big butts could be used as auxilliary storage for rent. Also, BTW, why are those sweats being sold in that size? I’ll never put my fat ass in them.

    • 1:26 am

      Thanks downcastmysoul,

      Glad you enjoyed the post. And damn right you’ll stay away from those sweat pants! No physician of mine is going to be walking around with “What’s up Doc?” or something equally offensive written across her ass.

      Take care.

      Don

  18. 10:37 pm

    At last, a faux pas I have not committed.

  19. 12:25 am

    I would wear some but I couldn’t find any with a beeper and the words “Wide load” on the back.

    • 7:55 pm

      Hello Eric,

      Don’t you even consider adorning your backside. A man should always wear respectable slacks.

      Thanks for stopping in.

      Don

  20. 1:26 am

    i think the back of their pants should just read ass, because, otherwise, they would not be able to find it with a map.

    • 8:02 pm

      Thanks Nonnie,

      I’m inclined to agree! They would likely benefit from labelling all of their clothes with instructions or one sort or another. Based on what I’ve seen, they seem to have trouble putting them on correctly. Hats backwards, shoelaces untied or missing, pants halfway down their asses, underwear showing.

      Honestly, I didn’t know getting dressed was so challenging.

      Don

  21. 4:53 am

    I’m thinking they need sweatpants with one of those back up alarms.

    Beep Beep Beep

    • 8:04 pm

      Thanks Hammer.

      You’re right. If they won’t outright quit the practice of wearing them, the least they can do is give us notice when they’re about to back old “juicy” up.

      Best Regards,

      Don

  22. 5:00 am

    Incredible post, Don.

    I saw these pants all the time in high school and even as a dumb 17 year-old I thought these pants were an atrocity. I’d recommend some stiff, blue, straight-cut dungarees for these teenagers, but I fear that even “jeans” are too rebellious for today’s youngsters. They could lead to kids skipping church and not respecting elders (especially in terms of lawns and demands to stay off of them).

    What can we agree on? Black slacks with decent suspenders?

    • 8:07 pm

      Thank you kindly Perry,

      You’re damned right we can agree on black trousers with decent suspenders. A pair of gray slacks can be a smart look as well.

      Appreciate the comment Perry. Nice to hear from someone with their head screwed on straight, damn it.

      All the best.

      Don

  23. 6:55 am

    Dear Mr. Mills,

    This is certainly one of your best posts ever. I truly appreciated “oblivious”.

    Also, men do have t-shirts that are just as bad if not worse. A co-worker of mine wore one to work that said “Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.”

    I know how to solve this problem. Everyone of your generation needs to go out and purchase a pair of these sweats. The first time “princess” sees grandma wearing a size 3x pair of sweats with “bootylicious” written across the back, she will think twice about wearing them.

    • 8:10 pm

      Thank you Claire.

      I appreciate the comment but suspect you’re getting a little “cheeky” again in your final paragraph. While you’re right in your suggestion that it might solve the problem, I don’t think there is any way that you’re going to get old Milicent Brockington in a pair of tight sweatpants with the word “bootylicious” written on them.

      Shame, she might be the one old gal that could pull it off.

      Nice to see you again,

      Don

  24. magickfaerie permalink
    7:21 am

    Seriously Mr. Mills, how do you think of this stuff? I hate those pants too but I don’t sit around thinking about them. Hm. Maybe that makes me the lucky one.

    If you want to know what really bothers men it’s people wearing their pajamas in public. I don’t know if this is a strictly Kentucky thing or what, but I see people in Walmart, the mall and even the restaurant I work in, and they’re in their pajamas. And I’m talking full deal here, all the way down to house shoes. I don’t get it! Surely these people don’t think they look good. They look like lazy slobs.

    Also, why the hell would you want words on your ass? I mean, most people just make fun of you for it. What’s the use of drawing attention if it’s negative?

    • 8:13 pm

      Thanks Jenny,

      Nice to see you again. I’ve never had the pleasure of seeing anyone in their full pjs while out shopping but I swear on a stack I saw a young man this morning in a t-shirt and pajama bottoms heading into an “employment centre” up at the strip mall across from the Home Depot.

      Sad thing is, he probably works there.

      Nice of you to visit with me. Hope you are well.

      Don

      • Jen permalink
        1:29 pm

        I loved this one – I don’t get to your site as often as I’d like but when I do, I’m there for hours. Gotta comment on the PJ’s. When I was young, there was a man in our neighborhood who would get out every morning in nothing but his underwear & walk his English bulldog around the block. No kidding. It was always right around 5:00 am, so at least it was still kind of dark out. But man, when you saw it, it would make your stomach churn (he was no Adonis, that’s for sure). Of course when I was a kid, there were actually people who were getting up that early to head for work – I’m surprised no one ever complained about him. Back then he was just the eccentric old neighbor. Today he’d be labeled a sex offender which is a shame, because there was nothing sexy about him.

  25. 10:24 am

    ” “My Other Ass Fits In Real Pants”

    For no reason other than it makes me chuckle.”

    LOSTL!

    That makes me laugh that it made mum want to read too. She had a laugh as well which she never does!

    We both dont like the words across the bottom either, but worse are the Ugg Boots! EWWWW!

    Bob

    • 8:15 pm

      Nice to see you young Bob.

      I have to admit I’m not familiar with the Ugg boots (though they have been referenced in the comments of prior posts). They sound damned awful though and if Bob Trusty doesn’t approve I think it’s safe to say that I wouldn’t either.

      Please pass my regards on to your mother, Bob, and keep yourself out of trouble.

      All the best

      Don

      • 9:18 am

        Ugg boots are boots that are made from sheep/lambs skin and wool. They’re fluffy on the inside and skin on the outside. They look Ugg-ly! LOSTL!

        But yes, i will tell mum that you said hello and that you’re a handsome young chap too!

        Bob

  26. 12:08 pm

    uh oh…… I’m wearing my favourite pants from New York circa 2001. They have Popeye written across the back and feature that pipe-chewing sailor on the front of my left hip…..

    In my defense I’d like to say that I DON’T have a terribly big arse

  27. 2:23 pm

    One of the problems I have with these pants is that they make ordinary citizens look like pedophiles. If even I can’t help but stare at the glittery “JUICY” plastered on the eight year old’s ass, how are the dirty old pervs supposed to stop themselves?

    I once saw a t-shirt in the children’s (like, ages 2-9) department that said “So many boys, so little time,” and another that said “MILF in training.” Those pants are all just signposts so people can find the gals who will put out. Not that you would, you know. Hit that.

    • 8:22 pm

      Thanks Barelyknittogether.

      That’s all incredibly distrurbing and, I think, very very sad. What the Hell is going on with people today?

      Now I really need to go lie down.

      Thanks for stopping in.

      DOn

  28. 3:49 pm

    As a fellow oldster like you Donnie, I don’t like that those damned kids are sportin’ on their rears, either.

    Then again, I never was into all that logo nonsense. My husband, Doyle (God rest his soul) used to were that Munsingwear designer clothing. It always had a little penguin on the shirt. Cute little fellow, that penguin. I didn’t mind that so much, but then all of a sudden, I looked around and would see little open mouthed alligators on shirts and then shortly after that, there were shirts with some albino lookin’ fellow on a horse while playing croquet (I think). Sure did use an awfull long croquet mallet.

    Anyhoo Donnie, my friends and family know how I feel about this ass and boob insignia stuff. I don’t like it nary a bit and make it a point to look annoyed and judgemental whenever I see some whipper-snapper galavantin’ around with the word “juicy” scrawled across her rear.

    Makes me long for the days when writin’ on shirts was simple and hilarious. I still have my “I’m With Stupid” T-shirt that I’d wear when my husband Doyle (God rest his soul) would wear his shirt that bore the word “Stupid” . We wore that to Disneyworld when it opened in ’76. We sure got stares. Tw0 40-plus year olds wearing that kind of foolishness. We were a funny couple.

    Best,
    Lenora Mae

    • 11:12 pm

      Thank you Lenora Mae,

      It sounds like you and Doyle were quite the fun-loving couple.

      I’ve don’t believe I’ve ever owned a t-shirt (I’ve had my share of undershirts) and suspect it’s too late for me to start now. If I did though, I can’t imagine what “saying” I might have emblazened across the front. “Get the Hell off my lawn” is the first thing that jumps to mind but I suspect I could come up with better in time.

      I was the same way with logos. In fact, I don’t recall any of my clothes having words or pictures on them. Don’t expect it did me any harm or I ended up missing out on anything.

      All the best Lenora Mae and thanks for visiting.

      Don

  29. 6:07 pm

    Hey Sunshine…..society is changing and young folk are finding different ways to be creative. Your only point i agree with is..the whole thing about the pants slung down..thats just god dang silly..its looks silly and plain stupid..the others..maybe you should get a sweatshirt that says CRABBY ONE….as always Zman sends

    • 11:25 pm

      “Sunshine”?

      We’re getting a little familiar here aren’t we sweetcheeks? You could at least make it Mr. Sunshine, damn it. A little respect goes a long way.

      Funny that you mention the sweatshirt when I was just pondering that very notion (in reply to comment above). Crabby one isn’t a bad suggestion.

      And now, I need to beat on you again, Steve. Do you really think that writing “Hump’N’dump” across your ass is creative? Give me a break! Wait a second, come to think, didn’t Rembrandt regularly wear a t-shirt that said “All I want is a beer and blow-job. Is that so wrong?” Sure he did and he was a hell of a creative guy.

      There is nothing creative about buying mass produced moronic filth. If they wanted to be creative, they’d find a way to express themselves on their own, not courtesy of some discount pant manufacturer with a particularly perverse sense of humor.

      God, Steve, you’ve gotten me worked up bad.

      These damned young people aren’t creative. Their impressionable, malleable, have no self respect and are not too damned bright either.

      Thanks for the comment, sweetchecks. You always know how to get my blood going.

      Don out!

  30. Boogliodemus permalink
    6:25 pm

    My brother told me of a gal he saw in California that had “Scratch N’ Sniff” on the seat of her shorts and “Reparations Now!” on the front of her t-shirt.

    • 11:27 pm

      Thanks Boogliodemus,

      “Scratch N’ Sniff”…

      That’s up there in “Hump N’ Dump” territory. I’m sure the young girl’s mother is very proud.

      Thanks for sharing.

      All the best,

      Don

  31. steppingthru permalink
    6:52 pm

    Good Afternoon, Don,
    I’m new to your blog but find it very funny and very true (sad to say). I’m enjoying reading your previous posts. Thank you for your honesty.

    • 11:28 pm

      Many thanks steppingthru.

      Appreciate your leaving a comment and hope to see you again.

      Don

  32. 1:16 am

    “Just this morning I was confronted with the disturbing sight of a young woman with the word “bootylicious” scrawled across her derriere. I don’t know what the Hell it means but I stand by my assertion that if your ass is large enough to accommodate a twelve letter word it may not be a feature you wish to draw additional attention to.”
    So great.
    I have linked you, and you have deserved it.

    • 11:29 pm

      Thank you Doctorate Upholder.

      Pleased to make your acquaintance. I appreciate the “link” and hope to see you again soon.

      Don

  33. Janus permalink
    4:02 am

    I have a idea. Maybe you could make a post about young kids and their disproportionate clothing sizes? Nowadays, a lot of boys wear baggy jeans and loose shirts, and girls wear clothing so small and revealing that they practically look like hookers.

    • Rick the Curmudgeon permalink
      6:52 pm

      Practically?

    • 11:31 pm

      Thanks Janus,

      I’ve beaten on the young people a few times for their terrible clothes but I’ll give it some thought. It is true – it’s like half the young people have 90% of the fabric.

      I appreciate the suggestion. Please, keep them coming, lad.

      All the best

      Don

  34. 11:50 am

    MrsN once bought me a sporty type fleece jacket with the makers name ‘HEAD’ in bold lettering across the back of the collar.

    I was always tempted to write ‘ARSE’ in similar style across the lower back of the thing – just so people walking behind me knew that I had put it on the right way up.

  35. 4:47 pm

    In the UK, we had a hard-hitting health campaign which got the message across by showing young people in clothes where the slogan had been replaced by the name of the sexually-transmitted disease they were carrying.
    What a great idea, I thought, until I realised it was just a ‘concept’. Personally, I’d like to be pre-warned about people’s health conditions before I catch them – disease slogans on sweat pants would be a double whammy. First you’d know to avoid them because they had syphilis, second you’d know to avoid them because they dressed like half-hearted clowns.

  36. Le Geant permalink
    6:08 am

    I don’t get it. They have words stencilled on their asses? When my old dad was alive, the only thing I’d want stencilled on my ass was “Don’t tread on me”, and I would have just hoped to hell that his patriotism got the better of his common sense! Christ, I need to go lie down now.

    –Le Geant

  37. 4:06 pm

    Dropped by via Joan of Aarrghh!! Probably the funniest piece I’ve read all day, possibly all week. And you’re dead on about ass advertising. If you’ve got to draw attention to your butt by writing something across it, chances are I don’t want to or shouldn’t be reading it. Good to see that many of you old fogies (no insult intended) can keep their sense of humor as well as us younger whipper-snappers.

  38. 4:11 pm

    “If You Can Read This Then I Need To Lose Weight!” should be sprawled on the back of their sweatpants. I wanted to buy ad space on the back of sweatpants, but the damned kids just sit too much for the ad to be read.

    • Lily permalink
      8:57 pm

      or, “If You Can Read This, Kick Me” ?

      • 2:56 am

        This reminds me of a shirt I always wanted to make in honor of my former boss. It would say in very small print right across the chest, “If you can read this my husband is going to kick your ass.” He had a little bit of a problem finding my face when speaking to me.

        I think clothing that encourages violence is usually a good thing, but having it on your ass sort of ruins the fun.

  39. 8:27 pm

    I day I start wearing butt writing is the day I jump out of a plane, have NO intention of ever doing either.

  40. 7:48 am

    Oh my goodness! You are hilarious!!! I’m ‘young’ but I don’t go walking around with sweat pants that have words on them. I don’t even care if it’s a logo or a tiny little picture. I won’t wear it if it’s gonna be on my ass!

  41. 5:04 pm

    thanks now I know what to rant about next.

  42. YellowRoses610 permalink
    3:15 am

    ARRRG! Fucking nasty things written on sweat pants. They have scared my eyes! My ears burn! I always see these obscneley huge wale women with sexy writting across their arse. It;s not sexy Damnit, it looks like a small SU.V so stop drawing attention to it already.

    • Mystsong permalink
      9:50 pm

      And it’s always written in shiny paint, too!

      I admit to owning a pair of underpants that had “Sexy” written across the back at one point. Btu they came free with a very nice nightgown and said writing was always covered by a proper pair of blue jeans in public.

  43. 8:27 pm

    I like what this said, but I think you have a bigger problem at hand called Agism. This is not just problems “old people” have, I have problems with it too and I am 21 years old. Never in my life have I worn words on my pants, but if I did, it would go something like this: “I am wearing pants with words on the Ass because I want to be treated like a branded cow”. Back to my main point though, if you treat kids like adults, they are more likely to grow up sooner, but if you label yourself as an old person, your just increasing the amount of labels that are already out there in the world.

  44. 10:06 am

    Ok, it’s not my website, but this ought to give you plenty to talk about: http://www.peopleofwalmart.com.

    Be wary, it’s not for the faint of heart.

  45. Momof2 permalink
    6:33 am

    Most of the people I have seen sport these pants and shorts you speak of are slim or well put togeather…I have seen few that are fat and lazy! I seen two girls out jogging last summer sporting words across there butts in fact!!! Most people that sport these clothes have nice backs sides and they no it!!!

Trackbacks

  1. One Night Stanzas » Blog Archive » Procrastination Station #43
  2. 9 First-Class Ways to Kill Time in the Airport | Wish.co.uk Blog

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