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God Damned Young People Just Won’t Move Out!

The problem with young people today is that they never leave home.

Back in my day, young people left home at a reasonable age and went out to make their way in the world.  We were shown the door at the age of 16 and if we couldn’t find an apartment to live in were expected to build one of our own.

It made sense, damn it! Parents had suffered enough during their years of child rearing and it was considered cruel to make them endure young people a day longer then required by law.

But these young people today, they’re like cockroaches – no matter what you do, you can’t get them out of the damn house!  They come up with all kinds of excuses but I suspect it’s nothing less than an elaborate young person conspiracy to drive their elders to insanity, bankruptcy and an early grave.

In my day, there was no way in Hell you’d find some mollycoddled thirty-something living in his parents basement while he tried to “find himself.” The only place he’d find himself was kicked to the curb – and he’d be better off for it. It’s no wonder these young people today all toddle around like oversized babies, they’ve been sucking at the parental teat for 30 years longer than God intended.

But the thing I really don’t understand is that when they finally do get up off their duffs and leave, they come back before the celebratory scotch has even been finished.  In my day, when you moved out your parents changed the locks, put a “for sale” sign on the lawn, took a new last name and moved to Florida in the dark of night.

How the Hell do we expect our young people to grow up if they’re still sleeping in a race car bed at middle age. Honestly, we’re raising a generation of perpetual adolescents and that spells trouble for the economy, the future and the god damned social fabric of America.

They never leave home. That’s the problem with young people today.

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104 Comments leave one →
  1. 7:35 pm

    So true, Mr. Mills! I just found out a guy I dated five years ago still lives with his mother, but now he lives there with his girlfriend and their baby. He’s thirty years old. Ugh.

    • 11:34 am

      Thank you Shannon,

      I think you made a wise decision in cutting your ties with that young man. He’s an obvious ne’er-do-well and likely a momma’s boy too boot.

      And I assume you mean that he lives there with his “wife” and their baby.

      Best Regards,

      Don

  2. 8:45 pm

    I second that…..younger folk complain they dont have enough freedom but cannot get up the nads to live on their own…i was up and out at 18..see ya….zman sends

  3. 8:58 pm

    “parents changed the locks, put a “for sale” sign on the lawn, took a new last name and moved to Florida in the dark of night.”

    Don, maybe the parents will be better off doing the same when the kid is at his high school graduation party!

    Anyways, I thought I’d nip by here and let you know that your are one of the recipients of my blog awards:
    http://soulsez.wordpress.com/2009/07/09/blog-awards-july-2009/

    Thank you for visiting!

    • 11:35 am

      Many thanks Archie,

      That’s damned kind of you. I’ll pop over after my raisin toast and have a look.

      Thanks again,

      Don

  4. Lily permalink
    9:55 pm

    Dear Don,

    Once again you have hit the nail on the head and described exactly what is wrong with society.

    Back in my day, everyone left home as soon as they could, because we wanted to be independent of our parents and have our own lives to live how we wanted.

    The only people who stayed at home living under their parent’s roof were disabled and/ or retarded because they had nowhere else to go.

    These days, young people lack courage, moral fibre and wouldn’t know what “independence” was, even if it poked them in the eye with a burnt stick.

    In a nutshell, they are too damned scared.

    In their parent’s basement, they certainly aren’t “finding themselves”. What they are finding is how to steal the neighbour’s wireless connection, illegally downloading porn, music (which ruins the music industry) and movies (which ruins the film industry) and playing online poker.

    These basement dwelling cockroaches are living in their fantasy virtual world, financially and emotionally draining not just their families but undermining the whole fabric of our society.

    Lily Fossil

    • 11:46 am

      Well said, Lily, well said.

      As usual, I agree with every point you’ve raised.

      I wonder if there is any chance that their illegal downloading of pornography might ruin that industry as well? I can’t say I’d be sorry for that particular outcome. In fact, I’d be quite delighted. This ridiculous modern day fascination with – and glorification of – pornography is repugnant to me.

      Thank goodness there are still folks like you out there Lily. Our social fabric is certainly unravelling but it’s folks like you that keep it from coming apart at the seams.

      • adam permalink
        9:31 pm

        hey you old folks severely screwed our chances as young adults to prosper and grow like you were able to do to your greed and crappy decisions and policies.. id love to even be able to have a job t move out but it seems you care too much about hiring illegals to make an extra penny. ya talk about society biting you in the ass huh..

        • 9:21 pm

          Sorry for the delay in responding Adam.

          I was busy using punctuation and yelling at my Mexican grounds crew.

          And don’t even try to tell me it is my fault that you don’t have the drive, intelligence or work ethic to get a damned job. Seems to me like you’re prepared to blame everyone else so that you don’t have to take a look at your god-damned self.

          Honestly, you young people need to give your heads a shake.

          Best regards

          Don

  5. 10:00 pm

    Here, Here (or is it Hear, Hear?). You got this one nailed! God forbid they should spend any of their hard earned money on rent or anything silly or mundane like that. All accumulated wealth has to go toward the top end electronics, fashion labels and trips to Europe.

    • 11:53 am

      Thanks Yorksnbeans,

      I believe it is “Hear, Hear” but if in doubt “Hear, here” will at least ensure that you’re never entirely wrong.

      Thanks for the comment. I have a neighbour down the street with an idiot son who fits that category. He’s somewhere between 19 and 30 (hard to tell because you never see him during daylight hours) and all of his money seems to go toward personal toys, not helping out his old mother.

      Doesn’t even cut the grass.

      All the best,

      Don

  6. Sander permalink
    11:05 pm

    Staying at home longer than necessary? No thanks. As soon as I’m done with my current education, I’m moving my ass to the Navy. It would be a year later than your ideal age of being shown the door, but at least I’ll actually stay away.

    • 11:55 am

      Good on you Sander.

      The Navy you say? A fine choice, lad, and I’m sure you’ll do well.

      Regards,

      Don

  7. Janus permalink
    11:13 pm

    Hello Don.

    If I may argue, the current state of the economy right now is hard on a lot of people, and they need to save money one way or the other, and some of them see staying home a bit longer as one way of doing it.

    Hell, a lot of people can’t afford college.

    • 12:04 pm

      Nice to hear from you, Janus.

      And, please, you’re free to disagree, argue or just plain tear a strip off me any time you like. Zman does it with alarming frequency but he seems subdued today.

      I’m sure that there are many cases where a lack of job may be holding some young people back and I don’t begrudge them that (provided they are trying) but I think there are a far greater number that are just a little too comfortable at home and (as Yorksnbeans suggests) are quite happy with a rent free arrangement which provides them with greater disposable income to spend on silly gadgets and fancy underpants.

      (Damn but that was a long and unruly sentence.)

      As for college. I was fortunate and had some additional education but some the finest people I’ve worked with (or for) didn’t have college degrees – just smarts, common sense and a good work ethic. Still, it would be nice if everyone had the opportunity to attend if interested.

      All the best, Janus

      Don

    • Spiritof76 permalink
      3:19 am

      Janus–this old lady sez that if they need time to get on their feet, fine, but they should be chipping into the family coffers, and if they can’t afford that, then they d–n well ought to be doing their own laundry and helping with food prep and clean-up, at a minimum. I also blame the parents who are afraid to ask these kids to help out. They won’t learn to be responsible if you don’t expect them to be.

  8. 11:40 pm

    They don’t leave home, they don’t clean their room and they leave wet towels on the bathroom floor.

    • 12:11 pm

      Thanks Hammer,

      God damned wet towels on the floor is the worst. How they hell do they expect them to dry if they are balled up in the corner? Thank God I don’t share my bathroom with anyone.

      All the best

      Don

  9. 12:18 am

    Don, there is a mathematical equation out there for people like you.

    Nail + on the head = Where people like Mr. Don Mills hit

    I couldn’t agree more. In fact, I once dated a guy who had immigrated from Central America (somewhere in the centre of it, don’t recall the exact location), and things were going great until he told me he was living at home until he came to Canada at the age of 20.

    I was like- “Dude! You lived at home until you were 20?”

    He was like- “Yes, my Grandparents lived there too…”

    I was like- “WTF?”

    We broke up shortly thereafter. I mean, its one thing to live with your parents when you are an adult, but to live with your parents parents? That’s just not cool. Turns out it was a cultural/family values/poverty thing…but still, a girl has to have her limits.

    Too bad, though, like my BFF would say he was a real looker.

    Anyway, keep speading the gospel according to Don, Don.

    bschooled

    • 12:29 pm

      Thank you Bschooled,

      Nice to hear from a young woman who enjoys mathematics. It’s all too rare. My wife, Aggie, was a whiz with the numbers. She balanced our cheque book every single month and had us on a damned tight budget. I have to admit that since she’s been gone the “Mill’s household bookkeeping” standard has slipped significantly.

      I don’t know much about Central America but I do own a fine panama hat.

      I think you made the right choice with your young beau. Family values, poverty and cultural norms sound like poor excuses for lazy behavior. I feel sorry for his damned grandparents but am sure they’re happy to see him gone.

      Take care,

      Don

      • gargi permalink
        10:10 am

        Funny! because in some cultures like Asisn/ Indian, not leiving with your parents is a taboo. You are supposed to stay with them to help them in their old age and take over the household responsibilities, so that old can live their days carefree.

    • adam permalink
      9:36 pm

      ya and your superficial expectations will keep all your cats good company. this is a messed up time, you are going with some superficial society beliefs that aren’t even alive anymore. it is quite common and smart to save some $$ before going out on your own.. and in the case of the unemployment and all your illegal immigrant boyfriends hording work and locking down positions when they hit managers so they can bring in more illegals .. well we young adult american citizens are up against a wall.. develop a heart.. and a brain. thanks!

      • Buck permalink
        1:54 am

        Nobody wants to live with their parents. NOBODY. There are few jobs. Fewer than there are students graduating. Those graduates are in debt – they are saddled with monthly payments that would make you think they were paying a mortgage on a house. Well guess what, they have no house, and they are most likely working for minimum wage in the service industry. You know, putting that expensive degree to good use. So fuck you Don. I’m one of the lucky ones. I managed to obtain a position in my field. I AM putting that degree to good use. I also live with my parents, and am in debt up to my eyeballs. It was a financial decision, but one I am ashamed of none-the-less. So again, fuck you. This just isn’t something I can take lightly.

    • Anonymous permalink
      4:45 am

      To live at home when you are 20 years old is not old

  10. Gerard permalink
    2:28 am

    Great post, Don. Although I think 16 is too young to move out of the house (and I believe it’s illegal unless the teenager emancipates himself/herself), I truly dislike when people are living with their parents past 20 (unless in college of course).

    I just turned 18, which you probably remember in a comment from a previous post, and I’m leaving to college this September! I’ll be back on holidays and in the summer, but after college I’m most likely going to move out and never live with my mom or dad again. Good thing too, as the older I get, it seems even harder to live here (that goes for both my dad AND me, haha). I can’t imagine how some parents/children put up with it.

    Once again,
    Gerard

    • Justin permalink
      7:59 am

      I’m with you on this one, Gerard. For that matter, once you get your first taste of freedom, you won’t want to come back. Plan on getting your own place your junior year or so, just so you won’t have to return during breaks.

      Once again, Mr. Mills, you’ve managed to convey one of the many problems with my generation. Keep up the good work!

      Justin

    • 1:06 pm

      Many thanks Gerard,

      I have no idea how people can tolerate living with their adult children. It’s no accident that the phrase “adult children” is a damned oxymoron. The whole notion is about as moronic as it gets.

      I wish you all the luck at college Gerard. Enjoy your summer and be ready to hit those books hard come fall.

      All the best,

      Don

  11. downcastmysoul permalink
    3:37 am

    Back in the day living at “home” even as an adult meant living under parental rule which meant being treated like a child. It took me some time but I moved out despite poverty and no transportation. I had to move back in for a short while some time later–it was a nightmare–and I left as soon as I could. Parents of the old school weren’t “cool” to be around like these “modern” parents today. These parents treat their children like friends and do not get any respect at all.

    • 1:08 pm

      I agree downcastmysoul,

      The modern young people parents are as much to blame as the sprogs they are mollycoddling.

      Glad you were able to strike on your own, young lady.

      All the best,

      Don

  12. 3:49 am

    Too funny. I will be back to read more!

    • 1:09 pm

      Many thanks Kate (a damned fine name by the way).

      Looking forward to hearing from you again.

      Don

  13. 6:50 am

    Dear Don,

    Personally, I will be ready to have my own life at some point, and that involves my children living somewhere else and paying their own bills. At the same time. I can’t kick them out too hard because I want to make their lives hell when I’m really old. I have to keep guilt on my side.

    • 1:10 pm

      An interesting approach, Claire.

      My Aggie likely would have agreed with you.

      All the best,

      Don

  14. 7:49 am

    no wonder why i can’t get rid of my bastard offspring. i did things ass-backwards! i moved to floriduhhh and then i gave birth to him. we don’t even have basements here, so i have to look at him once in a while! oh, the horror!

    • 1:10 pm

      Thanks Nonnie,

      You obviously didn’t read the manual.

      The only upside I can see is that without a basement to hide himself away in he may have no choice but to slink out the door in search of darker pastures. If he does, sell the damned house and move to Maine. That’s my advice.

      Best regards,

      Don

      • zeusiswatching permalink
        11:07 pm

        Move to Maine! That’s what my parents did! Now I understand why.

        I don’t have kids, but I’m going downstairs to bust a water pipe and flood my basement just to make sure some kids from the neighborhood don’t move in after their parents take your advice.

        • 11:17 pm

          A sound plan, Zeusiswatching.

          Those young people could descend at any time. Wise to be prepared.

          Thanks for visiting.

          Don

  15. 10:30 am

    I not only left home at 17, I emigrated. Alone.

    However, I’m embarrassed to say that my eldest son left home at 18 but four years later I moved in with HIM.

    I’m now the mother who won’t leave home. Though I wouldn’t try this caper with my other (straight) son – he’d kick me out on my ear.

    • 1:10 pm

      Thanks Nursemyra,

      An interesting twist there and some poetic justice as well. For a full role reversal, however, you’ll need to play loud rock music at 3 a.m., borrow his car liberally and eat the young man out of house and home.

      Nice to see you,

      Don

  16. Lynn permalink
    4:15 pm

    “it was considered cruel to make them endure young people a day longer then required by law”.

    now that’s classic don!

    • 4:31 pm

      Thank you Lynn,

      I’m hoping “classic don” is a good thing. It sure wasn’t when my wife Aggie used to say it. I’d forget an appointment or lose my car keys and she’d just shake her head, wag her finger at me and say it was “classic Don.”

      Always nice to see you Lynn. Thanks for visiting.

      Don

  17. 4:43 pm

    It’s even worse in Spain where most young people are not expected to leave home until they get married, so it’s not uncommon for 30-40 year olds to still be living with parents and having mother cook for them, do their washing & ironing, clean their rooms, etc.

    No wonder they don’t get married. Who’d want to get hitched to someone who can’t fry an egg or wash their own socks?

    I left home at 16, got a part-time job so I could finish highschool, and have been looking after myself ever since.

    An aside. I thought of you this morning when I was on the bus and saw two young guys offer their seats to two older gentlemen who had just got on. I turned to my friend and said, “I bet Donald would enjoy hearing about this”.

    • 10:34 pm

      Thank you azahar,

      That’s a damned heartening story about the bus. When I take the local 54B I end up standing next to the pregnant women and infirm while the teenagers take up three seats with their gigantic pants and huge backpacks.

      All the best, son.

      Don

      • 10:47 pm

        Son? :?

        • 11:15 pm

          Sorry Azahar,

          I just visited your “about me page” and must now apologize for my assumption. Regrettably, it isn’t the first time. I made the same mistake with downcastmysoul and a whole host of others.

          All the best, lass, and again sorry for the mistake.

          Don

          • 11:27 pm

            No worries. My real name (Shawn) causes even more confusion. And I can’t expect everyone to know that azahar means orange blossom – at least I think that would be a gender indicator.

            • 11:35 pm

              Thanks for your understanding, Azahar.

              I see you’ve lived in Winnipeg, Toronto, Bristol and Salamanca! Quite a variety. Back when I was working, I spent a couple of weeks in Winnipeg and I used to get to Toronto quite often. Can’t say I’ve ever been to Bristol or Salananca, though.

              All the best,

              Don

  18. 7:39 pm

    I agree 100%. However; I think a good form of punishing these people is to make them live with their parents their entire lives. When their parents die, the children will suffer because they don’t know how to live alone. This will teach them.

    • 8:18 pm

      An excellent idea, Mr Heare.

      Perhaps serious offenders (the hardened layabouts, with the saggiest-assed trousers) could be sent to live with Mr. Mills?

      He would doubtless enjoy sharing the benefit of his many and varied experiences with these young rapscallions, whilst also feeding and clothing them, as per your suggestion.

    • 10:41 pm

      My God, Ahmnodt, I hope you’re not serious. The only ones suffering will be the old folks that are stuck with these damned overgrown pups until the day they die. Kick their asses out at 16 and wash your hands of them. It’s the only way.

      And, Nobby, you damn near made me spit my rye all over the computer screen. That will be quite enough of that kind of talk, thank you very much.

      Jesus, my heart’s beating like a rabbit.

      Don

  19. 1:19 am

    I couldn’t agree more, Donfather.

    The only thing that comforts me (and hopefully thousands of millions others) is that adultss that still live at home probably get less sex than a pregnant cat in an elephant cage. Thank god we have you, Donald, and Karma to set this life straight.

    Sail freely,
    Frankelstache

    • 10:43 pm

      Thank you Frankelstache,

      I hope you’re right but I’m not so sure…those damned young people are serious about their fornication and will go to great lengths to get it, even if they are living under their parents’ roof.

      You sail freely as well, son.

      Don

  20. 2:56 am

    The trick is to have a 10pm curfew and perform a field sobriety test. When my balled up wet towel teenager turned 18, I made her life even more miserable by demanding rent. She now lives with her boyfriend who still lives with his mother.

    • 10:44 pm

      Thank you Tricia,

      A damned fine approach. I’d consider changing it to 9 p.m. but beyond that – a solid strategy.

      Thanks for visiting.

      Don

  21. 8:23 am

    Oh noes! I still live at home with Mum, but thats her choice not mine! She misses me so whenever i say that id like to live out there or even next door!

    So i stay with mum and ill be here for a long time to come, but i make sure i pay my way by doing a large amount of chores.

    Ive always wanted a Racecar bed, but mum says that it would stimulate me too much at night when im supposed to sleep.

    I hope you’re having a great weekend, Mr Mills!

    Bob

    • 10:52 pm

      Many thanks Bob.

      There will always be special cases, Bob, and special young people like yourself.

      You listen to your mother, Bob, and stay near to home. It would likely be unsafe for you to venture out on your own and I’d hate to see anything untoward happen to you. (Your most recent date is a fine example of the kind of mischief you could get into without the firm and guiding hand of your mother.)

      You stay put, Bob. You’re the exception that proves the damned rule.

      All the best, son.

      Don

      • 7:53 am

        HOORAY! Thats great because i love living with my mum as well. Its Win-Win!

        as you said, id just end up getting into mischief and mayhem like all those young people out there and thats just not acceptable!

        Bob

  22. 4:16 pm

    I actually went one better, Don. Shortly before my 18th birthday, my parents announced they were planning on moving the family 1200 miles north to the middle of nowhere.

    I told them I’d stay. So, in essence, my family moved out when I was 18.

    On second thought, this actually sounds like one worse. Either way, you make a good point.

    • 10:54 pm

      Many thanks CLT,

      In my view it doesn’t matter who packs the bags as long as their is a decent break at a decent age.

      Still, I have to wonder what kind of trouble you were getting into that would require your parents to pack up and move 1200 miles to the middle of nowhere.

      Best regards,

      Don

  23. 6:54 pm

    I left home at 16 and worked part-time jobs to pay my rent in the rooming house and finish high school. Then it was off to the navy for 30 years.

    When my son graduated high school and was accepted at a university, I bought him a set of Orvis luggage. . . I bought myself a new set of Schlage locks for the house. He is now a successful businessman, married and owns his own home.

    • downcastmysoul permalink
      8:20 pm

      I did a variation of the room and board rooming house thing: even that was better than living at home!

    • 10:56 pm

      Many thanks MCPO Airdale,

      That’s a fine story and an example more families should follow. I salute you sir.

      Regards

      Don

  24. 9:17 pm

    Hello again Don,
    Couldn’t agree with you more. That Norman Bates should have moved out years ago.
    Take care of yourself.
    Oh, by the way; Mondrian was a painter who liked to paint pictures consisting mainly of straight lines, rectangles and squares. Hope I’m not teaching you to suck eggs.
    Mike

    • 11:01 pm

      Thank you Mike.

      Appreciate the comment.

      I’ll be honest, you lost me halfway through. I don’t recall a prior reference to any Mondrian (but I’ve been a little off my game lately. Some new medication and it’s playing Hell with my memory).

      I knew a Larry Mondario back in the 1950′s but he wasn’t a painter, he was a CPA (and not a very good one.)

      Let me know if I’ve missed something here, Mike.

      Thanks

      Don

      • Mike Silk permalink
        11:07 am

        Hello Don,
        Regarding the Mondrian mystery. A little while back I likened your chair to a picture by one Piet Mondrian; “Broadway Boogie-Woogie” comes to mind.
        I rather regret it all now, as it makes you look tremendously uncultured, and me a pretentious, smart-ass, arty-farty, toffee nosed nancy boy. (Feel free to interrupt).
        Au revoir!

        • 1:40 pm

          Thanks for jogging my memory Mike.

          And you’re right, it paints us both in a poor light. That’s why i stick to “Garfield” references for both literature and fine art. It’s universally recognized and damned funny too. That cat has a Hell of a chip on his shoulder.

          Au revoir to you as well.

          Don

        • 2:57 pm

          Since we’re talkin’ chairs here, I likened your chair to the dad’s chair on Frasier–a popular show here in the US. Only your chair is more retro. It needs some color, though; maybe green and purple.

  25. 9:37 pm

    Read this post and…

    I locked the doors the other night when both of my sons, 18 and 19 yo were out skateboarding, pulled the drapes and kicked back knowing full well that a few days on the street would expose them to the reality of self reliance on their life after home.

    Have not seen them since.

    Now I’m the one who feels guilty about what I have done yet hopeful they are ok.

    Their friends tell me they are downtown living under the bridge and I am going down there tomorrow and see how they are doing.

    Tough love? Bad decision? I really need the Barcalounger King’s help on this one

    • 11:06 pm

      Thanks for visiting Russ,

      My dear wife, Aggie, was the one for handing out advice – I tend to just provide opinions – but I’ll see what I can do.

      Sounds to me like the lads are having an adventure. Sleeping under the stars, foraging for food, fighting off predators. It’s probably the first time they’ve lived off their wits in order to scrape by. I’d say you’re doing them a huge favour and that in a few years time they will god damned thank you for it.

      Hold the course Russ. Keep the door locked, the lights out and your chin up. You’re making men of them.

      All the best and good luck,

      Don

  26. 1:52 am

    I left home at 18 and in fact moved out of the state. I did live in a basement of someone I didn’t know though…I paid rent. Kids these days!

    • 5:17 pm

      Damned straight Mr. Jelly.

      I had you pegged as a good lad the day I made your acquaintance.

      All the best,

      Don

  27. reva shane permalink
    1:03 pm

    Mr. Mills,

    When I ventured out on my own it was rough. Small town southern girl moves to the capitol city and damn near FREAKS OUT. My dear Mom would lovingly tell me ” Why, you just come on home honey and I’ll put up the baby bed” That threat of that baby bed kept me out there and made me the functioning adult I am today.

    God bless you and God bless Mom.

    • 5:18 pm

      Thank you Reva,

      You made the right choice there, lass. Good on you.

      And God bless you as well.

      Don

  28. 9:04 pm

    im 25 and would never want to move back home! my parents are old and don’t understand me. always like, “why are you smoking so much?” “why do you spend money you dont have?” “why are you snorting sugar off a mirror?” its just not worth the headache.

  29. 2:08 am

    Oh whatever, you’re just a crazed ol man who wants to live back in your day.

    It’s 2009 b!tches so why not live with your folks till they kick you out? less bills to pay. Especially when you haven’t even made it to a full-time on-air personality in radio. shit radio doesn’t pay anything. that’s my plan anyway.

    Oh sorry about the swearing (that’s the problem with young people today), lol
    hope ya have a good day.

    -kyle

  30. 8:21 pm

    Ya, I, like, totally agree. When I was living at my sisters house for fourteen years, her damn kids wouldn’t move out. They were, like, twenty-five and twenty-six. I told them that, as the oldest living male in the house (me), they should obey their elder (again, me) , but they just laughed and kicked my ass. I’m telling ya: NO RESPECT!

  31. YellowRoses610 permalink
    6:57 am

    I would mostly agree with you, though there are some circumstances where it is alright.

  32. Tseyi Wen permalink
    5:00 pm

    Perhaps you can give a talk to my parents! Their over-protectiveness traditional Asian values and guilt-tripping ways is suffocating me at their place. I’m 23 years old, I was completely on my own for a while due to school, but had to move back in with them due to a situation, and now they won’t let me go where I want. It has to be their way or none now, and I have no intention of going where they want me to go or living the way they want me to live. I am completely capable of supporting myself and acting responsibly (not to mention frugally), but hesitate to move where I want (1,000+ miles away) because of all the tears and tyranny my parents direct my way. My folks are looking to control me (or is it smother me with love?), but I love them and want to be their good child too. So, I’m in limbo and I’m going crazy! Just wanted to get that out.

    • Anonymous permalink
      4:43 pm

      Back in my day …my husband looked at this mother and let her know he was free white and 21…. a more gentle and PC approach would be to tell them you love them, here is your new address and hope to see them soon. If they love you, they will get mad but eventually they will understand. Question, how old were they when they moved out?

  33. Fenekk permalink
    4:48 am

    As a young person myself, twenty one, to be exact, I have to be honest and say that I am still living with my parents. However, I have been doing this while I am going to college and working.

    I don’t intend to stay with them as long as I can, actually. For that matter, we are selling the house and I will probably be out on my own within two months. I’m sure it won’t be easy – I don’t have the security I did with my parents, but I know that living on one’s own is an enlightening experience, and it is in fact the gateway to the real world. You can’t truly experience the real world until you are taking care of yourself.

    I have a stepfather whose brother is still living with his mother, who is now so old that she can barely support herself, much less him. He has been living this way for so long that he cannot take care of himself at all. He can barely microwave his own food. It is truly a sad state of affairs. This is the product of what you speak of. I can’t even have any respect for this man who can’t do a thing for himself besides sit on his ass, drink Pepsi, eat potato chips, and watch hockey.

  34. 8:26 pm

    I’m real serious and interested for a pretty, young, working class lady for real friendship.I’m a young guy of 24yrs old,single and searching.My name is nelson,bet my friends call me nelly.I’m 5.8inch tall, fair in complexion and hairy.I jst graduated this year from the university of nigeria nsukka.I just need someone to love,someone to cherish,someone to think off,someone who will give me happiness and joy,that’s all i need.I’m a simple kind of person and who ever must posses thesame trait.I studied banking and finance but not yet working.Whoever take’s this place,is cuz she will mean the world to me.You can contact me with this number 08065494341!or with the available email adress.Ciao

  35. Jon permalink
    2:08 am

    Don,

    What age did you move out and what year was it? Lets go through this logically, America has just shed 8 million jobs, with that in mind lets all move out into an oversupplied housing market because old people are upset that people are still living with their parents(Smart move). I am a returning veteran who returned to this crappy economy, so yes I still live with my parents unfortunately. strictly a financial decision. When I do get a job I am moving out as soon as possible. However when I get this job I cannot wait to pay for the policies that your generation has saddled me with. Have you thought about that in this rant of yours? Who pays for your Medicare? Social Security? Oh thats right the YOUNG people, we will be slaving to pay your generations awesome policies for the next 100 years, and I have read that we also lack ambition? Here tommy go out in the world, get a good job, make America competitive again so we old people can have our prescription drugs for free, with a bigger increase in COLA for our Social Security checks as well. You make me sick, as well as the entire senior population at times. Hypocrites.

    • 1:48 pm

      Thank you Jon,

      I’m not sure you managed to get through your diatribe in a completely logical manner, son, but I do appreciate your trying and welcome your comments.

      I don’t believe I’ve seen any evidence of young people paying for anything, Jon, so I’m not entirely convinced that they’re picking up the tab for my elaborate lifestyle and fancy designer medication (Tonight’s menu: Peacock steaks, Dom Perignon and Coumadin with a Plavix chaser) . I was under the misguided notion that my 60 years of saving, paying taxes and contributing to the economy was more responsible. My mistake.

      And I had a wee chuckle at the notion of young people slaving. That’s damned funny, Jon. I assume you mean slaving over their bongs, X-boxes and internet porn?

      Anyway, this notion of free prescription drugs, COLA increases and Christmas Social Security bonuses (just building on your ideas, Jon) is damned appealing so if you could rouse Tommy and start making America competitive again you’d certainly have my gratitude.

      All the best Jon. A small piece of advice, if you don’t object. I’d recommend you try not to get so damn worked up. Old people may make you sick but if you keep up at this rate you’re almost certain to do yourself an injury.

      Good luck with your job search and thanks for your service to your country.

      Don

  36. 5:27 am

    I guess all those over grown Asian kids who have been living with there parents well into their twenties are all wastes of damned space as well. Lazy bums, no way will their economies ever get in order nor will they learn what independence is about!

  37. Anonymous permalink
    9:57 pm

    All you old people need to stfu. If you don’t want anything to do with your kids then don’t have them. Don’t try to find loop holes to be a cheap prick when it comes to supporting your own child.

    Did you save ANYTHING for your child’s future? You want to whine about your kids staying with you but probably didn’t even give them a single DIME towards anything. The “well I did it” old fart excuse is ridiculous. Just because you were a bum struggling because your parents were a bunch of dicks, doesn’t mean your child should have to endure the same.

    Obviously living at home is lame as hell and no young person really wants to be there, however having a law in place so you can skip out on your responsibilities was and always will be ridiculous.

    That is your offspring, you decided to have them, and then turn around getting mad they can’t move out. While your ass accepted all the benefits of having children. Probably got free stuff or a nicer seat or someone moved so you could sit your lazy ass down with your kid in a stroller at the front of the bus. At that moment everyone is supposed to be aww a child aww take my seat, now when your kid is grown and broke because today’s society equals it’s ok to be a cheap ass parent and not save one penny for your kids.

    You want to throw him/her out?

    Then you have more old farts not even offering jobs to “young people” but want to whine your kid can’t move out.

    Majority of old people are like this, feel they “endured” so much and deserve some kind of “reward”

    What kind of reward do the young people get for having to endure changing your f’ing diapers when you are drooling and way more annoying at like 80 years old? Those nurses that will be taking care of your drooling ass will be young people. Some of which are living at home and wouldn’t be there without that benefit.

    Society’s problem is adults having too much power, if you didn’t save one cent for your child, and think you did your “duty” because you fed/clothed your kid you = the problem.

    Stupid people having sex and accidental children that don’t save one dime then want to party and stuff when their children are older and haven’t contributed anything to their child post 18 = the problem. You guys don’t even plan for the future but think it’s young people’s faults.

    Hell I know someones Dad who stole all his money from his first job, he was like 17 working at a ice cream shop part time, then one day his account was completely emptied because his stupid adult brain doesn’t know how to keep up with bills on time and has to steal from his own son.

    Useless ass adults.

  38. Oldperson in youngperson costume. permalink
    6:40 am

    Interesting. What started off as a laugh got pretty serious in the comments.

    Personally I moved out when I was 18 and am now 23. I’d rather die than move back in with family. Nothing wrong with them just feel it took so much effort to achieve that type of independence.

    As someone with a mediocre job and social status-finally getting a landlord to accept a young person as a tenant took so much hard work and convincing I’d never give my apartment up. I spent a long time in hell living in abusive share-house situations in order to afford the rent went I first moved out.
    At one point I really wanted to move back as share houses/renting with others (both old and young) was a thousand times more stressful and horrible than living with family. There still was the privacy and freedom issues as you share the same house with other people with different ideas of what you can and can’t do.
    Little things build up like having the grumpy 55yr old immigrant woman pull your clothes out of the washing machine and dump them on the floor, hassel any friend that dares to visit, stick thier nose over your shoulder every time you try to cook and give “suggestion” when you are trying to learn by yourself in privacy…Attempt to ban you from inviting friends over for even nerdy activities like study!
    Then there’s the other young people that have sex in their bedrooms and due to the paper thin walls you can hear every uncomfortable sound… *shudder* And there loud music and mobile phone conversations.
    Or having a bath and have a 30yr old woman burst in and have a poop! Yes these things and more do happen when renting with others….

    On top of that most of them had bullying personalities and took great pleasure on picking on me–the youngest, kind hearted one that did not have the confidence I have today. I remember a friend conviincing my shy personality to get out of the house and come dancing with her. She did my make-up and lent me a dress. I was feeling really good for once until the old lady walked past and said I looked like a whore..I was too embarassed to go so she ruined the night.

    So based on my horrific moving out experiences and also it is true that when looking for a home job older people do say infuriating things like: “we want someone with more experience” So they want work and rental references and if I had a bad temper I would have strangled those winkled dictators and told them:
    “How the @#$% can I get rental reference or work experience if you won’t let me through the door?! Got to start somewhere!!!

    So I finally had peace when I was lucky enough to get out of those situations by living with a slightly older partner who works and helped get my foot in the door.

    Without him I feel a young woman like me wouldn’t have much of a chance. But they should still try and some of them really don’t know the meaning of try.

    They looked down at my situation as like you said they are coddled and wouldn’t want to move out till they had heaps of money as they don’t want to do it spartan like I did the real way with a mattress on the floor.

    Maybe I’m an old person in a young persons body because I feel they should do it too and go through the trials and eventual triumph that moving out without much money will cause–you really grow up and you certainly won’t be immature any more.

    To summarise I can see why it is hard but that’s the exact reason why the other complainers need to move out…to gain that life experience which will make them value the prize at the end of finally having thier own place away from family or random renters.

    I know some people that still live at home but they pay rent (severely discounted) by still they don’t really help out and mostly buy fancy clothes, new phones and videogames. I think this turns people into adults that lack empathy for what hardship is and what it means to really succeed.

    P.S.
    Like the other women I wouldn’t date a man that still lived at home. A major turn off!

  39. JudyGreenEyes permalink
    12:18 am

    My youngest son has a pretty good job in one of the trades, I keep showing him the door, but he thinks I’m full of it. He is 26, has a car, two motorcycles, and a girlfriend who also lives with her parents. I’ll tell you, when I was young, if I had a decent job like him I’d have been out the door at 12 or even 8 years old, ’cause back then kids couldn’t wait to get away from home, that was the dream. Now kids have no shame. I don’t get it, I quit feeding him, how come he keeps coming back?

  40. Anonymous permalink
    3:13 pm

    I like to think of the future. This little piece of work I have to call my son, someday might grow a set, get some other piece of work little girl pregnant and have their own little piece of work that won’t leave. By the way he is 26, good paying job, MOMMY still wipes his ass for him. No wonder he stays.

  41. Sarah permalink
    3:28 am

    Maybe your generation should have done a better job of parenting.

  42. Guts permalink
    8:34 am

    1.) America needs to prepare their kids to become men and women.

    2.) Parents need to stop sending their kids to school, because that isn’t helping them in becoming men and women.

    3.) American parents need to show their kids the way of becoming an adult, and what he or she needs to do. In order to survive in a corrupted world like America.

    4.) Schools are not the way, to making a child become an adult. Proven fact in poorer countries like; Laos, Africa, and etc. Children from poor countries become men and women easier and quicker, because they’re poor. They adapt naturally, because of their environment. And of course, their elders teach them the ways of how to survive, and become like an adult. Unlike American elders. Lol!!! But this is serious, and very true. Even though i am laughing.

    5.) Its not the kids fault 100%, its also the parent’s faults, if a kid is stuck and lost in his or her parent’s home or house!!! God Damn it!!! Teach your kids how to be a men and a women already!!!

    5.) Schools surely don’t teach our American children on how to become men and women!!! Teachers just like to pretend and lie, that their doing a good job. Most of them, in the end. Teachers only care about themselves, and how they’ll survive in this country. Making sure they look good, and so they lie that they’re good teachers. So that they can keep their jobs in America. Lmfao!!! I can see threw all fake and corrupted false teacher.

    6.) They don’t even give a damn about helping the kids with bad grades!!! The problem with most teachers, is that they think all students can learn as fast as each other!!! Some people need longer time, and more training!!! And sometimes, people that learn slower, become experts and masters. If they just have more time to get to learn more details about a new skill, or anything else that they don’t already know about.

    7.) America is a failure. Especially the American parents. The ones who get mad at their kids for being scared to go outside into the world, and learn new things. The kids in America are lost and scared, and don’t know how to become men and women. The future of America looks sad and hopeless. I blame America itself. For first, stealing the land of Indians, and for bullying other countries at the moment. Because they’re bored. And don’t give a damn about the newer generations of America. The kids of America are lost!!! God damn it!!! Snap out of your stupid pointless racist bulling shit, and come help your children in need of becoming men and women!!!

    8.) America is no longer a rich country. It was because of greediness, that got Americans into this mess!!! America is only still alive to this very day, because of fake products, and fake money!!! God damn us all to hell!!! What the fuck will happen to us in the future, if we keep living on like this, my brothers and sisters of America?!!! We need to stop hating on each other, and try to actually help each other. And work together, and stop being strangers!!! Instead, become united.

    9.) We’re called,”The United Stats of America”. But are we, really? Not a chance!!! For us to truly be united together as one, we must be able to talk with each other. And see how things are going around the entire state, and see if a state needs help with something. And repeat the process. For us to call ourselves untited, it is a shame.

    10.) Americans need to start talking to each other more often, and find out how to help each other, the best that they can help. We are shady to each other, especially if we’re different races. C’mon America!!! We’re all Americans. Why so shady to each other? We’re all humans. Yeah, we’re different skin colors. But so what? We’re brothers and sisters, in the end. We’re all from Earth.

    Please, Americans. Stop being shady to each other from now on. Only then, will America’s future be a bright and good one.

    • Judy permalink
      12:52 am

      I’m an American and I have to agree with you. Back when my mom and dad were growing up America had the Great Depression. The music they listened to, the movies, they all show that their generation were very mature at 21 years of age and people were considered old and wizened at 45. Many like my aunt left home and moved to New York City at the age of 14. No it wasn’t easy, she said she cried herself to sleep every night for a year but she stayed and made her life there. My dad went into the coal mines at 14 and worked there for 45 years. My mother moved out at 18, to be near her first job. She said she nearly starved, finally making ketchup soup until she got her first paycheck. When I came around my parents were mature and settled about life. No kid would dare tell them how it was supposed to be. My brother and I helped them out in their old age and we did it without complaint. The recent generations are very different, they expect to have what the parents have right away or it’s not worth trying. They expect the grandparents to babysit their kids so they can have a life. Yes I blame the schools for painting a rosy picture. All you have to do is graduate and get your degree and the world is your oyster. Parents are at fault because many were raised during the 1950′s when a lot of adults had steady work and the cost of living wasn’t so high. They wanted better yet for their kids so they gave them cars and allowances etc. Those kids, my generation, had a less mature outlook on life though we thought we knew it all. Following generations have declined from there. Who is going to teach kids to grow up when Mom and Dad think partying with friends on the weekend or being involved in some cause is more essential? Very recently many find there is no money to party and barely enough to support their lifestyle so men and women are killing themselves and their families because they can’t stand the thought of going through the hardship people like my mom and dad had accepted to be part of life.

  43. Lucy Ann Bentley permalink
    11:05 pm

    I have to say you are comepletely and utterly wrong! I have just turned 17 and have been living alone for 4 months, ignoring that fact that most parents wont allow their children to move out until atleast 18 it is also against the law. whilst there are some small minded ‘young adults’ that chose to sponge off mum and dad for as long as poosible, there are in fact those who work part time and live alone whilst studying. Also current minimum wage for 16 year olds doesnt cover the cost of living itself, given the recent change in law, all children must be in a form of education until they are 17 (in 2012/2013 year 11) and 18 (from year 11 2013/2014) it is therfore impossible to have a full time job.
    I think you are somewhat out of touch with modern society, this is nearly 2013 things are not the same as they used to be. I bet if you had to go through some almost essential processes today like learning to drive you would understand. It has costed me £802 for my driving lessons alone, ignoring the cost of theory and practical test, insurance, tax, mot and the vehicle itself.
    Get a grip.
    Yours daithfully
    A ‘cockroache’.

  44. jenny permalink
    7:35 am

    wow, they are your children.
    they didn’t ask to be brought in to this world.no matter how you see. or seen . it your
    the grown-up. now pal . so don’t for get your role!! I am not sure but I almost think that I was feeling mad// about what I had just am knowing i am new on the w. w. w
    so this gives me much to think about .thanks ? I think?

  45. jenny permalink
    7:37 am

    wow I will keep you in my prayers

  46. Annette permalink
    3:16 am

    It’s so sad to believe all of these comments. I have given both of my sons as much love and knowledge of how to be men on their own a parent can. This generation is lazy , sad , and irresponsible . They have cell phones under mommy and daddies plan, an xbox and they don’t want to pay rent or cut the grass. No matter what the comments say about you had them, help them is nonsense. What about standing on your own. .? So you have to flip burgers, so you have to eat ramen noodles, so you have no phone, who really cares? We didn’t destroy this country , everyone did, not just the last generations , we worked and all the jobs went as well, seniors lost all their savings, their pensions. Everyone is responsible for themselves, they are taught as best as possible, but no matter what I am not responsible for the lazy kids of today. Get out grow up and get some backbone instead of just wishbone .

    • Buck permalink
      1:42 am

      “We didn’t destroy this country” .. Are you sure about that? You sound awfully defensive for someone who takes no responsibility for the sad state of affairs.

  47. Axel permalink
    4:05 pm

    This rule should be followed in privately business, parents should kick their children out of their companies to work for others or start their own independent business.

Trackbacks

  1. God Damned Young People Just Won’t Move Out! « The Problem with Young People Today Is… | The Twohy Organization
  2. Ceasar Rian: What’s Wrong With the Young People of Today « Adventures In Writing
  3. Teenagers : atonement for our sins !! | Up Above

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